wikialityfandomcom-20200214-history
The Colbert Report/Episodes/EpGuide/Episode 475
Production Info Intro SEGMENT1 * results of yuesterday's election * Stepehen couldn';t sleep ** he tried to count republican Senate seats * squeezing stress ball ** it turned to dust and relaxing * Dr. Colbert called it, from 11pm last night ** President-elect ... * Oprah got crappy seats ** redistributing Oprah's wealth * Repubklicans were out of touch * Large Hadron Collider ** could create a black hole, destroy the earth ** started in September, when McCain was ahead * jolted us into a parallel universe ** obama is president ** PHillies are world champions * 349 electoral votes ** not a mandate * set back for McCain campaign ** ** come back and take this thing * no bigger underdog than the guy who just conceded SEGMENT2 * fairy tale ** snow white and 7 houses * like children filled with wonder * afraid of monsters * Tonight's Word Change * fear has been currency for the last 8 years ** Laissez Scare * fear market could just keep going up and up * fear got overvalued ** bottom fell out * fear bubble burst * America elected a guy named Barack Hussein Obama ** America bears some responsibility * our fear-bloated livers would have been the foie gras at the McCain * fear industry ** scare mongers will lose their jobs * Stephen still has faith in the system * Barack Obama's Term Of Terror ** a woman was driving home alone *** followed by a truck * the story should have injected liquidity into your pants Threat Down 5 Sensitivity * New York Times OpEd page published poetry 4 Corey Booker * he obsessed on his delicious America's racial 3 Universal Health Care * Stephen doesn't want to pony up the bill every time an alien pops from someone's chest cavity, clearly a pre-existing condition 2 Barnyard Animals * Calif passed a law to give chickens the right to do the hokey-pokey ** Chig, when a chicken is crossed with a pig * cheese will sue for age discrimination * bananas will have to be 18 before people will be allowed to eat them * tofu will demand the right to vote 1 Black Presidents * asking for a catastrophe * terrorist will team up with an asteroid to hurt America ** Obama will sit down and talk with no preconditions Interview * Ambassador Andrew Young * longtime civil rights pioneer, who Stephen will ask what happened to the Bradley Effect * My Black Friend * Barack is not black ** Afro-Asian Europan-American * racists hate themselves ** insecure with yourself, you pick on others * was speechless that the day would come when Stephen asked him back to the show * was in Chicago with MLK * more afraid in Chicago than Mississippi * he said Stephen had it right ** people rejected fear ** Obama awakened the faith people had in America * wants Stephen to talk to Gorlock ** * Obama's transition team ** Stephen deserves one ** UN job is cushy * MLK in 1964 believed we could have an AfAmer in 25 years ** HW was black or Young is calling MLK a liar * We should thank W * blacks have not seen the promised land * every thing is so messed up that now it's been handed to black people to fix Epilogue * Ambassador mentioned Gorlock ** reinvest in America * watching from nutrient pod * sell all Stephen's shares in Scarcerarium ** put in low-yield bonds Gallery Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Motherload Videos External Tubes *Link Title *Link Title Reviews and Comments